Fear vs Peace

The last several months at church they have been talking about our relationship with God (see my post here if you want to "catch up"). This Sunday, Kelly talked about the "end times" and how we have a very fear based faith when that is all we focus on, when the fear of being "left behind" is all we are thinking about. (If you want to hear his message, you can go here, then click on "Sunday Messages", then "Missed It", then "End Times").
I know for myself, that has always been a huge thing in my life, the fear and how it controls my actions and my time that I spend with God or lack thereof because I know cognitively that I shouldn't be motivated by guilt and then I slack off in my reading and praying and do not spend any time with God and we all know what happens when you do not spend time or energy on a relationship. That's right...nothing!
Last night I was realizing how much I do not want to pass this on to R. I want him to grow up, free of fear, knowing the God of the Universe who created him and wants a relationship of peace and harmony with him. As he does for all of us, no matter what. I cannot imagine wanting my son to fear me and what I could possibly do to him, and I do not believe that God is this way with us either. He is a God of Love. I want R to continue to bring joy wherever he goes and someday when he is old enough I want him to be able to tell people Who gives that joy. But it all starts with his primary caregiver and the role models he has in his life.
It's funny what you get when you sign up for this parenting thing. I know people always told me that they learnt a lot from their kids and that you want to grow and become a better person because of them, but I never imagined that it would be daily and an awareness that is always on my mind - sometimes at the forefront and sometimes on the periphery, but always there. And for that I want to say thank you God, and thank you R!